When the Gf’s away—
Oh wait! I’m at her house rn for Thanksgiving!
And…I’m kinda losing my mind over it. I’m pretty nervous rn. So yeah, to cool my nerves we’re rewriting the Snow White AU instead of a story ABOUT Thanksgiving lol.
____
SO, I’m re-writing my Snow White AU, ya know because i CAN! But(and this is gonna sound weird), I was inspired by the “Good Times” Version of Snow White(well, a funny review on it). I realized I can get my “falls into deep sleep” fix by using the sequences(3) of the OG Snow White Fairytale. MUAHAHAHAHGAA!
There’s also a bit of “Snow White With the Red Hair” that inspired the beginning of this :D
ALSO! I don’t like Shrek, AT ALL. I hate it(long story. But I vaguely remember this scene of Lord Farquad looking in his Magic Mirror for a Bride. I thought it’d be funny if instead of being Jealous of the “Fairest of Them All” story, we had a “If I can’t have you no one can!” Situation.
So anyway Mineta Warning.
Also OOC girls of MHA
TW: Gross Flirting and Gropeping, Harem, Choking, Poison, Mineta
LETS GOOOOO!!! Happy Thanksgiving!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Once Upon a Time,
There was a vain and ignorant King named Mineta. Mineta was a shallow man, and cared not of the soul but of the body. He valued his kingdoms riches and looks, and not the people whom dwelled in it. In fact, one would think the womanizing King would care very much of his people. But no. King Mineta was seeking once again another Queen, all the others demoted to concubines. Mineta approached his Magic Mirror, and spoke “Mirror Mirror On the Wall, Who is the Fairest One of All?”
The foggy glass of the mirror swirled and morphed, to show a visual answer to the King’s question. It showed a young peasant girl, whom resided in the Village not far from the royal castle. She was a rather plump girl, with dark brown eyes and messy golden hair.
All in all, not Mineta’s type. After all, how could a women so curvy possibly be the fairest of them all? However the Mirror never lies. If this Women was the Fairest of All, she would become his Queen. After all, King Mineta deserved the best. And so, he sent his trusted Advisor Denki to fetch the young women.
Molly was making her way home from her early afternoon shopping. She had run into a few friendly faces, and was having an overall wonderful day. Up ahead she saw a Royal Staffman walking her way. He had blonde hair and—Oh dear, that was Sir Kamanari! Rumor has it he only appaears when sent to fetch King Mineta a knew bride. Oh, how Molly pitied the poor soul.
Sir Kamanari stopped right in front of her, blocking her way. “Are you Ms. Molly?”
Oh shit, Molly thought. I’m that Poor soul.
“Y-Yes, can I help you?” Molly tried to stay calm.
“Well Hey~” Sir Kamanari winked. “Its your lucky day Missy! You’ve been chosen to become the Queen!”
Molly gasped. “N-No way!”
“Yes! Isn’t that exciting!”
“No, not really! I don’t want—“
“I can see why the Mirror stated your the Fairest, Quite the plump bottom you’ve got there~” Sir Kamanari grabbed a handful of her rump, and Molly gasped.
She pulled away quite the distance. “Th-Thats impossible! I am by no means the fairest!”
“The Mirror never lies. Now Come with me—“
“NO!”
“Huh?”
Molly began to back away. “I refuse the King’s offer!”
“No one has ever refused the King.” Kamanari said. Not in a angry way, but more of a “wow, I didn’t know that!” way.
“Well they have now I suppose.” Molly began to run home.
…
“She WHAT?!”
Sir Kamanari shrugged. “I don’t know why, no one has ever dented you King Mineta!”
“She dare Reject me?!” King Mineta stood from his throne. “Well, if I can’t have the fairest of them all then no one can!”
“What are you saying?”
“Summon the Huntsman Kirishima. Order him to lure Molly into the forest and kill her. Have him bring back her Bleeding Heart!”
“K-Kill her?!”
“Did I stutter?”
“No your majesty…”
______________________________
Molly walked through the woods with the Red Haired Huntsman, keeping an eye out for blonde fur. The Huntsman, named Kirishima, had approached her in a panic. He had lost his hunting dog and companion, Bakugo, and needed help to search for him in the woods. Molly agreed to help search for the dog, if she was allowed to pet it once found. Kirishima happily agreed.
“Here Doggy!” She called out. “Bakugoooo?”
She heard a loud bark from a few trees away, and rushed over. There was a blonde dog, almost WOLF, angerly barking out.
“Bakugo! There you are!” She approached it carefully. “Kirishima has been worried sick about you!”
Bakugo growled, and suddenly stepped past her.
Molly turned around and shrieked. Bakugo was protecting her from Kirishima, who was raising a dagger! Kirishima was going to kill her! She backed away and allowed the doh top protect her.
“Bakugo, out of the way!” Kirishima cried out.
Bakugo just roared.
Kirishima sighed, and dropped the dagger. He fell to his knees, a few tears falling. “Your right boy, I can’t do it.”
Bakugo approached his owner, and nuzzled him.
“This all is so un-manly…”
“What…WHAT WAS THAT?!” Molly screamedm, approaching the two.
Kirishima looked up at Molly. “Ms. Molly-“
“You were going to kill me! Why?!”
“I was ordered to, by King Mineta!” Kirishima claimed. “But I can’t do it. You don’t deserve to die.”
“Damn right I don’t! Is this how he handles every girl rejecting him?…”
“No one has ever had the bravery to do so.”
“Huh, thats fair.”
“You have to run.” Kirishima said
“What—Where?!” Molly yelled.
“Away! The King will not rest until you are dead! You must leave this kingdom and never return!” Kirishima yelled back. “Now go!”
Molly nodded, and began to run deeper into the forest.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In hindsight, Molly should have asked Kirishima for some supplies before she ran. She was cold and hungry, and lost as hell. She could be going in circles, and lost forever in this darkness! Suddenly, she’s heard the creaky of an old cart approaching. A small torch could be seen lighting someone’s way.
“H-Hello?” The man called out.
“H-Hi, yes!” Molly responded. “I’m over here!”
The small torch lit the area, and Molly was now speaking with a young traveling baker. He was very handsome, big and strong with spiky brown hair.
“Are you alright?” The man asked.
What was Molly supposed to say? That she was a normal girl from the Village and a Creepy King was trying to get in her pants so she had to flee the kingdom after escaping a murderer? That she was now a hungry and homeless girl alone in the woods?! Not only was that a bad situation, it was an embarrassing one!
“I-I’m lost,” Molly said. “And I’m not sure which way I’m headed.”
“Oh gosh! And its so dark here, you must’ve of been terrified! I know I am whenever my torches run out.”
Molly nodded.
The man reached into his cart, and lit another torch he handed it to Molly.
“Here you go!” He smiled. “My name is Rikido Sato.”
“I’m Molly,” Molly said. “Thank you so much! You have no idea Howe much this means to me.”
“No problem. Oh, and here!” He got a pastry from his cart and handed it to Molly.
“Oh my gods, thank you!” Molly took the food. “Thank you so much!”
“I…I’d hate to see such a nice and pretty lady scared and upset.”
Molly blushed. Sato at least had respect when flirting with her, unlike a certain King.
“I need to get going,” Sato said. “…I hope to see you again!”
“Me too,” Molly nodded.
…
Thanks to Sato’s torch, Molly was able to survive until daylight. And as luck had it, she had found a diamond mine! Surely there would be someone inside whom could offer her shelter, or at least tell her where she could find a place to stay.
Molly made her way through the shining mines, and up ahead spotted two miners. One had fluffy pink hair while the other had slick blonde. She approached them, and they stopped their mining, They introduced themselves as Mina and Aoyama.
“What can we do for you Ms.Molly?” Mina smirked.
“I’m in a lot of trouble, and I need somewhere to stay.” Molly said. “Do you know any place where I can stay?”
“Mon Ami~” Aoyama gasped dramatically. “You must stay with us!”
“Are you sure?”
“Of course,” Mina said. “If you can clean our house, you can stay in it.”
“Thank you so much, you have no idea how much this means to me!”
_______________________________
King Mineta approached his Magic Mirror. Now that Molly was out of the picture, time to finally find his new bride! Surely the newest fairest of them all would love to marry him!
“Mirror Mirror, On the Wall: Who is the Fairest of them All?” He asked.
The Mirror shifted, and it once again showed Molly. She was in a cottage on the edge of the Kingdom, talking to a young man. The two were as laughing and sharing pie.
“Impossible!” King Mineta gasped. “I have to kill her…”
King Mineta began to pace. He had sent his most powerful hunter! Whats more Powerful than a hunter?!…….A Jealous Women sure comes close.
King Mineta rushed through his palace, and burst into his harem.
The women of the harem swarmed him, blessed to see their king after so long.
“Ladies, Ladies, I have a mission for you.” King Mineta smirked.
“yes! Yes! Anything our king!” The ladies cried.
“Kill Molly, the Fairest of them All!”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Molly had been staying with Mina and Aoyama for a few days. It was a safe and simple life that she was very greatful for. Sato had even visited a few time! She was fallen fast and hard for the boy baker.
Today, Molly had wandered to the nearest and smallest market for groceries. There were many sales people calling out advertisements for their products, but one had caught her eye.
There was a women with a skinny waist and a black haired ponytail selling coresets. They were all very sparkly and beautiful. While Molly had no money to afford one and didn’t actually need one, she still decided to take a look.
“Hello Ma’am!” The women said. “My name is Momo, would you like to try one of my Coresets?”
“Oh, no thank you.” Molly said. “I can’t afford one. Plus, I doubt they fit me.”
“Nonsense!” Momo said. “My coresests fit anyone and everyone! Allow me to show you!”
Molly rolled her eyes, but nodded.
Momo began to fasten a dark purple coresest around Molly’s waist. Momo was right, it did fit! Well, at least when lose. Momo began to tighten it. And tighten it tighter. And tighter. And tighter! Molly began to see black spots.
“M-Miss..!” Molly cried out.
“Is that—“ Momo yanked one last time. “TIGHT enough?”
Molly collasped to the ground, breathe shallow and short.
…
Molly awoke to a local police officer standing above her, and Mina looking scared but releived.
“Wh-What happened?” Molly gasped for air.
“There was an illegal saleswomen here,” the police officer said. “She tried to suffocate you with a Coresest. Luckily, your friend here found you and came for help.”
“Molly! I’m so glad you’re okay!” Mina hugged Molly.
Momo had failed her King. Momo, was executed.
___________________
Molly was so excited! Sato had asked her out on a date! She was giddy as she walked around the market. Mina and Aoyama had been so happy for her, they sent her to the market with some money to get something nice to wear for the date.
Molly being Molly, something shiny at a jewelry stand had caught her eye. The saleswomen had brown hair and rosy cheeks.
“Hello Miss!” She smiled. “I am Uraraka, do you see anything you like?”
Molly scanned the table of jewels, and spotted a beautiful hair comb. It was golden with silver and purple jewels “This is lovely! How much is it?”
“No charge,” Uraraka said. “It looks so wonderful with your eyes, you must have it!”
“Really? Thank you!” Molly put it in her hair and kept walking.
As Molly kept shocking, she easily became much more fatigued and weak. Molly was about to sit down on a bench, when she collasped just a few stepped away from it.
…
This time, Molly awoke to Aoyama. He was smashing the comb, saying he was insulted Molly would wear such clashing colors! He rushed Molly home, as it was almost time for her date.
Uraraka had failed her King, Uraraka was executed.
______________________
The date between Sato and Molly had gone very well. The two were deeply in love. Molly was sitting at home, daydreaming when there was a knock at the door. There was a young women with purple hair and largish ears standing with a basket of fruit.
“Hello, can I help you?” Molly asked.
“Hey,” the women said in a chill voice. “I’m Jiro. I tried a new method with growing my orchard this year. I’m going around and offering free fruit samples to see if my method was any good.”
“Oh, that’s lovely! I hope it did!” Molly said.
Jiro held up the basket. “Lets find out!”
Molly took an apple, and bit into it. It tasted bitter and sour. She opened her mouth to tell Jiro that sadly, her crop was gross. However, she couldn’t get anything out before the breathe left her lungs and light left her eyes.
Jiro had pleased her King.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sato made his way to Molly’s cottage. It had been quite a few days since he had heard from his girlfriend, and he was worried. Had he done something? Sato knocked on the cottage door.
Aoyama opened the door slowly. He looked very…not fabulous. His hair was messy and greasy, and his eyes looked very said.
“O-Oh! Sato…!” Aoyama gasped.
“Aoyama, whats wrong?” Sato asked.
Aoyama began to cry. “I-I’m sorry! We…We just didn’t know how to tell you!”
“What happened?!” Sato pushed passed Aoyama. “Is Molly O…..Kay….”
Molly lay in a simple wooden coffin in the middle of the room. She had clearly been dead for more than a day, and the flowers around her were already wilting.
“N-No….” Sato rushed to Molly. “How did she die?!”
Mina held up an apple. “W-We found this…” she said through her tears.
Sato sniffed it. “Its been poisoned!”
“We think it was King Mineta.” Mina said. “He’s been after her, wanting her dead. I guess he got what he wanted!” She sobbed louder.
Sato held back his tears, as he look Molly’s cold, limp….dead, hand. He held it tight as he gave Molly a farewell kiss. And the, a miracle! Molly’s eyes fluttered and flashed open, and she gasped for air. She sat up in her coffin.
“What…What happened?” She asked.
“Y-Your alive!” Sato cheered.
THE END
(Could You tell I go tired? LOL. Happy Thanksgiving!)
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